I’m still feeling really down. On a scale of 0 to 10, I’m at about a 7-8. It’s still bearable, but at this rate it won’t be for much longer. I saw the psychiatrist yesterday and let her know how things were going with the new medication. She’s changed up the antidepressant meds but kept the mood stabilizer the same. I think that if we changed the mood stabilizer that all hell would break loose in me right now. You know when you have surgery of some sort or an injury that takes at least 2-3 weeks to start to not hurt as bad? You know, it still hurts a lot, but it’s bearable and tolerable, provided you don’t move. That’s basically where I’m at emotionally. If things remain somewhat calm around me, I’ll be able to endure. If someone rocks the boat though.. It likely won’t end well for either of us. I’m not one to ever become physically violent or anything like that. I just have absolutely no energy to deal with bullshit right now. I’m looking at you, certain office in the midwest who wastes my time and energy.
So, I have a new boss, too. He sent out one of those inspiring quote things to our group first thing Monday morning to set the week off on the right foot. Monday was a clusterfuck. I replied with one of my favorite quotes in the afternoon stating that it fit in the context of the day (not directed at him):
“I can explain it to you, but I can’t comprehend it for you.” – Ed Koch
Luckily for me, this new boss has a sense of humor. You’d not believe how conservative the company I work for is.
On an unrelated note – Comcast sucks. I know everyone knows this and they’ve likely even said that more than a few times over the years, but man, they really, really suck. I wouldn’t be so hard on them if they didn’t charge a ton of money every month for internet that they have the monopoly on the local market with, but the actual service itself is haphazard at best. After several visits, different line techs checking outside and such, they’ve come up with nothing. Maybe we’re living on top of the gateway to some dark place or something. All I know is I’m liking having to drive with my laptop and a power inverter to Barnes and Noble, or after hours, sit in a Wholefoods parking lot to syphon bandwidth to get work done. FYI: Wholefoods is probably giving everyone far too much radiation exposure while they shop for organic food because the broadcast distance for their guest wi-fi is not only impressive, but they give guests an actual decent amount of bandwidth. I downloaded a damn Linux .iso from from the outskirts of their parking lot last week. It was like war driving – old school.