Professional courtesy 

Late yesterday afternoon one of the reps that I support didn’t check with me about availability and sent out a meeting invite to myself and the a customer’s senior management for mid afternoon today. I’m usually booked out weeks in advance, but for conference calls I usually am able to get one scheduled for before 9, after 4 or around lunchtime as I can use my lunch break and participate in the call. This is the second time in two months that this rep has done this, then was a real prick when I asked to reschedule. Yesterday was no exception. He’s also committed full on-site days at customers without checking with me first on several occasions. 

I support 9 offices spread out through the Midwest, hence my extensive travel. For those 9 offices I support 1 director each, roughly 10-20 reps depending on the size of the city it serves,, roughly 7-13 techs for each branch as well as hundreds of customers. I always follow up and always take care of things in a timely manner. This rep is the *only* one in 3 1/2 years that just doesn’t seem to get it.

I was professional in the email exchange that followed, but made it extremely clear that he’ll get 15 minutes of my time today, but no more.

I shouldn’t have to teach a man in his mid 50’s the concept of professional courtesy. I’ll be on the call so the company doesn’t look bad, not him. 

Endoscopy 

Nothing was clearly visible. Biopsies were taken from my esophagus, stomach and the connective tissue to the rest of my digestive tract where it meets with the stomach. I really hope pathology can come back with an answer, and soon. 

I borrowed a coworker’s camera body to see if I like it or not. My old camera is about 12 years old now, so it’s time to think about getting something newer. I’d like to get a full-frame, but considering I’ve barely shot in the last 3 1/2 years, I just can’t justify the expense. A used 70D may be ok for getting back into it. At some point over the next few weeks I’ll decide if I want it, then talk with my wife about it. Continue reading

The wold will go on whether you move with it or stay put

The last few years have been a roller-coaster. Things have settled quite a bit in some aspects of my life, whereas in other areas things have happened that I never, ever anticipated. At this moment though, I feel like I’ve run out of gas. I’ve been tired and short-tempered lately. This last weekend it finally hit me hard. Aside from feeling tired,  I couldn’t get much sleep between nasty headaches and really painful heartburn that I’ve had for a few weeks. I’m getting an endoscopy next week, or sooner if need be. Right now I’m on a diet of water, saltine crackers and Zofran as that’s about all I can tolerate. I managed to get through my flight this morning for work without vomiting, so that’s something.

Some things I didn’t expect over the last 3 years:

  • Getting a job that pays well
  • Getting a house (first house)
  • Deciding that I want children
  • Getting my vasectomy reversed
  • Getting another dog
  • Making it to 40 in spite of depression (almost; less than a month away)
  • Liver and kidney problems getting better, then worse, then better, then worse, rinse and repeat

Those are all but one, good things. On the flip side there’s the depression part. Sadly, that would fall on the list of things I did expect. Monday of next week I see the psychiatrist and I need to decide if this will be the usual three month check-in for refills, or if I tell her that in spite of being chocked full of psychoactive medications that I’m still having days where I seriously weigh the pros and cons of pushing forward. Pushing forward.. That’s about as watered down of a euphemism as I can come up with. I still manage to get out of bed each day, am present and functioning relatively well at work, and hopefully, being a good husband.

So, do I dare say anything, or not? If I were giving advice to a friend, I’d say without hesitation to tell their psychiatrist/doctor that they are still feeling pretty awful. On one hand I don’t want to feel like this more often than not, and on the other I just don’t want to go through the trial and error process of medications. Again. That leads me back to where I weigh pros and cons. I go through these mental gymnastics, but the only option is to push forward. I can either let it crush me or live my life in spite of it.

(I honestly wonder how long I can keep this duality thing up)